THE CHICKEN CAME FIRST


GM technology never ceases to amaze. At this stage, almost everyone and their aunt should be aware of animal genes added to plants, and frogs that glow in the dark. Now it seems Easter eggs of the future may be an entirely different thing. In Japan, in the wake of the Fukushima nuclear disaster in 2011, some local chickens laid eggs with no content. Disaster, we hear you think. Not for all. G.M. scientists at a nameless but major multinational food producer acquired some of these chickens and went to work. This has led to a new type of chicken that has been patented and is currently seeking F.D.A approval in the USA. Apparently, the process involves manipulation to the genetic sequence of the chicken genome. The major additions come from the D.N.A of cocoa pods, with D.N.A from an as yet unnamed reptile. These ‘improved’ birds produce hollow chocolate eggs shells. Boffins lovingly refer to the birds as ‘Chockens’. Reptile D.N.A lowers body temperature, ensuring the eggs don’t melt during laying. Research has also begun using ostriches. Good Food Ireland chocolatiers have no plans whatsoever to incorporate the ‘Chocken’ in their production techniques. All have confirmed they will continue as always to produce hand crafted chocolate Easter eggs seasonally, using traditional methods and only the very finest of natural ingredients. April Fools!